Dear Ty

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Dear Di,

My girlfriend has given me a straight-up no when it comes to us having sex while she’s on her period, but I’m more than willing to get messy. I think that there would be something really sexy about getting my girl off while she’s menstruating. How can I convince her to let me in during her time of the month?

—Parting the Red Sea

Dear PRS,

I used to feel the same way as your girl, so let me give you the goods on a woman’s thoughts about our monthly present from Mother Nature. Some women feel bloated and undesirable during menstruation, and that can make it hard for us to gather up the same enthusiasm in bed. And because many girls aren’t into gore scenes at the best of times, the last thing we want is to create a bloody battle scene in the bedroom.

However, also speaking from experience, period sex can be great once you finally decide to take the plunge. You get the benefits of free lube, and sex actually reduces period cramps thanks to the feel-good endorphins released during sex and orgasm. And it might sound crazy, but period sex will make the length of her period shorter, as the contractions of her orgasm will shed the uterine lining a little more rapidly—so that may be enough to convince her.

The best thing you can do to get her on board is talk to her about it. Pass this article on to your gal, or tell her some of these benefits of shagging during her period. In the end, it’s her body and the only way you’re going to have good period sex is if she’s as into the idea as you are.

If you both decide to give it a go, you can also keep the sheets as clean as possible by laying some towels underneath her—and then it’s up to you to deliver the goods, because there will be less spillage when you’re on top. Personally, I always prefer to totally avoid clean-up duty with some steamy shower sex instead.

Finally, let her know that you have no reservations about taking the ruby road, and layer on the compliments around the time she’s going to get her period. If you make sure she feels sexy, she’ll be more comfortable trying something new.

Love,

Di

Dear Di,

One of my sexy guy friends brought me along to a double date with his friend and another girl. During the night, we paired off (me and my hot friend, and his friend and the girl). When we woke up in the morning the hormones must have still been high, because soon we were joined by the other guy and his girl and then all four of us were hooking up sharing a bed. I found myself making out with the other girl—that’s all—but I have never even felt the slightest attraction to women before that. Since that day a few weeks ago, this girl and I have become really good friends, but I’ve never been able to forget our hot hook-up that night. Was it just the heat of the moment or am I officially now bisexual? Should I bring up that night with her and see if she feels the same way?

—Dear Di, Am I Bi?

Dear DDAIB,

Funny how a little morning light can bring quite the sexy swap of partners. I am in total support of trying out batting for the other team at some point in your life, just to see if the grass is in fact greener on the other side.

I don’t know if you can pin it down on being bisexual based on that one experience. You may have just been experimenting with some erogenous inner desire, felt more liberal in bed with two guys and another girl, or this could be the beginning of a whole new chapter in your own personal Kama Sutra novel. You might want to do a little inner sexy soul-searching: Are you comfortable as friends with her, or have you been wanting another make-out session (or more)?

If you two have stayed friends since that rather stimulating morning in bed, I think you’re OK to bring it up casually in conversation to try and tease out her thoughts on the experience. It’s quite possible that she’s just as confused as you are about your morning macking, and you two might be able to laugh it off as a crazy morning impulse. Or, maybe she too has been craving a little more spice in her sex life, in which case you can talk about further feminine experimentation if you are both so inclined. If she already has some girl-girl experience, maybe she can help you understand how you’re feeling.

Make sure you respect her and yourself if one of you is more gung-ho than the other for some female lovin’. And remember that protection is just as important when us gals get together.

Love,

Di