Toonie Tuesday has been changed to Threenie Tuesday

A flyer posted on the doors to the University of Ottawa campus pub, 1848, has caused a stir in the student body. The flyers notifies the patrons and public of a recent change to the much beloved Toonie Tuesdays, raising the price from a two-spot to a “threenie.”

The change has caused hysteria to say the least, with rioting in the University Centre this week. This has caused some confusion, as those purchasing books have found themselves mixed in with the fray of beer drinkers foaming over. Protest organizer, Molson aficionado and fourth-year political science student Dorothy Young threatens that there’s no end in sight to the “actions.”

“This is what? A 30 per cent increase?” the non-math inclined Young asked. “That means a quarter less beer,” she said. “I’ve been going to Toonie Tuesdays since the second year of my undergrad. I can’t believe they would change such an integral part of the student experience,” continued Young. “I mean is nothing sacred anymore? What’s next, Panda Game?”  

The establishment may soon find themselves in legal trouble from the Federation Against Killer Expenses for Students (FAKES), a group dedicated to monitoring price hikes at campus pubs. FAKES was first alerted to the story after a picture taken of the notice went viral on Twitter.

The increase has also left students scrambling to find extra money, searching between couch cushions in the common rooms of 90U, Marchand and Stanton. This has led to increases in security, scattered cushions, many found objects, at least two breakups over aforementioned found objects, and the befuddlement of residents.

“I mean, it was weird to see second and third years roaming the halls,” says Gabe Thompson, a first-year resident of Stanton. “But then I saw my CA joining in and I was just totally confused when she asked if I could spot her a threenie.”

The financial implications for students could be dire. Fourth-year economics student, Tommy Grant voiced his concerns to the Tomato. “Personally, I can’t afford this change in price and I know a lot of my friends can’t either, it’s just too drastic. We’re just going to have to find a different place, I guess. Plus, I’m not sure, but I don’t think a threenie even exists. Are you quoting me on that? Don’t quote me on that. Can you spot me a threenie till next Tuesday?”

Management has assured customers that value will be added as part of the deal, including a reduction in snarky comebacks by staff, but many, including second-year engineering student Phillipe Garceau, are skeptical. “If I’m being honest, I’ve seen about one and a half times slower service, and about a fifty percent increase in spillage. So far, it’s not looking good.”  

Go and enjoy cheap beers where you can, and if someone could spot the Tomato a threenie that’d be great.