humour

When it comes to spoilers, most of my friends and family would say I’m a kind of radical idealist. For the most part they’re probably right, as I will go to extreme lengths to advocate for the avoidance of unwanted plot information pertaining to movies, television, books, comics, etc. At the end of the day, I admit, I’m a Spoilerphobe.

Panic has gripped Ottawa elementary school students this week after third grade class president Kyle Tompkins addressed his peers across the city regarding reports that several students are being treated for a potential case of cooties.

“When I walked through a door for the first time last week,” said Adams. “I wasn’t scared anymore. Besides smelling a bit like a block of aged cheddar, I was symptom-free. Avoiddoorance doesn’t control me anymore. Now I’m the one in charge.”

New law outlaws women’s body hair A law passed on Jan. 5 states that women in Canada are no longer allowed to grow hair anywhere other than on their heads. After male members of Parliament deemed women’s body hair a danger to themselves and others, it was decided, with a majority vote, to ban it …

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