IT COULD BE WORSE — AT LEAST THEY DON’T READ THE CHARLATAN
Dear Di,
I’m an avid Fulcrum reader but my crush prefers La Rotonde. He’s got that ‘je ne sais quoi’, or maybe it’s a ‘je ne sais rien’ — my French is what some would call “mal,” so I can’t say for certain. Is this barrier going to be a dealbreaker in a potential relationship?
Monolingual Maverick
Dear M.M.,
I think I understand your struggle. Back when I was your age, it was easier to figure out if my crush spoke my language and filter potential matches accordingly — after all, we used to have these things called newspapers that we would sit on the bench in the park and read.
Although a Rotonde reader may have also made my head turn on occasion, I understand the hesitancy to attempt to cross the metaphorical Ottawa River — the language strait.
Maybe your crush just can’t understand the Fulcrum’s ramblings? Have you thought about letting him know that you can just hit the translate button on the website to view the articles in other languages?
I often do something similar with my current situationship’s messages, where I paste them into ChatGPT and tell it to feed back what the text would say under the pretense of him loving me, and respond to him accordingly. But I digress.
Is your crush scared that maybe the English language paper could be better than the one written in his native tongue? Maybe your crush needs some exposure therapy to treat that source of discomfort.
In that case, I would advise creating a burner account on Instagram or Twitter and sending them all of the latest news from the Fulcrum. That way, he would have a safe environment (when he inevitably doomscrolls his feeds before bed) in which to encounter his fears.
At the end of the day, some differences can be overlooked. As long as you think with enough subliminal messaging his opinion could be altered, I see no reason to avoid asking him to split a pitcher at F&S sometime.
Maybe you could even practice some unconditional radical acceptance, and start reading the odd Rotonde article. Hell, the university even offers French as a second language classes — if you really want to win him over.
I can’t make your decision for you. I will advise you that it could be worse — at least he doesn’t read the Charlatan.
