Dear Di,
My boyfriend is not circumcised, but I’ve only been with guys that are—what exactly am I getting myself into?
–Uncircumcised Uncertainty
Dear UU,
You’re not the first to join the conversation about uncircumcised penises.
In the 21st century, there’s a big debate about the morality and use of circumcision. People have finally come to realize that there is no medical reason to get a circumcision, unless you’re following some cultural or religious traditions.
If fact, circumcision was originally introduced in North America as a means to prevent sex, since 19th century doctors saw it as a good way to stop young boys from masturbating.
So in reality uncircumcised penises are far from abnormal, and engaging with one of these members actually holds a number of benefits.
For example, the foreskin covers the penis head to protect it from abrasion or infection, similar to the outer labia for the vulva. It is just an extra layer of covering that gets pulled back for cleaning and sexual encounters. The foreskin also acts as a natural lubricant, which makes “gliding action” during sex a whole lot easier.
Blowjobs aren’t a big deal either. Just slide back his foreskin with one hand to uncover the head of his penis. The penis head exposes the ridge right below, and it is the most sensitive part of the penis for sucking, nibbling, and licking.
It may feel weird initially, so be sure to communicate with your partner during sex the first couple times. Every person has different sexual preferences, but you only need to feel confident in your own sexuality and communicate to discover theirs.
Just like during the holidays, the fun part of an uncircumcised penis is the unwrapping. Enjoy!
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
My anniversary with my partner is coming up, and I’m trying to plan a sexy night for us to remember. Do you think a massage is a good way to lead into a romantic evening?
–Memorable Massage
Dear MM,
There are lots of books and videos nowadays on erotic foot rubs, back massages, or stimulation of any other part of the body.
If your partner leads an especially busy or stress-filled life, a massage can help them relax and brighten their spirit, increasing your chances of having a pleasantly romantic evening.
If you want to get in the mood, don’t underestimate the importance of ambience. Think dimmed lighting or candles, their favourite music in the background, and their choice of beverage.
Ask your partner if there is part of their body they like getting massaged. When massaging, you want to remember to use slow consistent movement, using your thumbs for pressure while rubbing.
Don’t be afraid to ask if the pressure is too strong or too light so that your partner feels comfortable asking you to adjust. This is especially important so that your partner feels relaxed, not frustrated. The goal is for you to ease your partner’s stress in their body or mind through touch.
Whether it leads to sex or not, you will still be raking in the brownie points, all the while making your partner feel loved and appreciated.
Love,
Di
