Dear Di,
I love comic book movies, but my boyfriend doesn’t. I started reading comic books when I was a kid and it kept me distracted from being bullied at school. It was an escape and it always put me in a better mood. Seeing all the movies coming out now is awesome, but how do I get him to understand so he at least enjoys it when we watch them together?
—Movie Mismatch
Dear MM,
Not to worry, because these days there are so many superhero movies to choose from that there’s bound to be a couple that can pique your partner’s interest.
But if that’s too obvious, there are a couple subtle ways that you can sway him over to your nerdy side.
This could include dressing up as characters from your favourite movie. Introduce him to the world of Comic-Con, and maybe role playing could be a new thing you do—not just for Halloween, but in the bedroom as well.
Now, if you find that the more time you spend on this with your partner the more unhappy and annoyed he is, you may want to take a step back and change your game plan.
Take interest in your partner’s hobbies and try to find connections between the comic books you love and your partner.
Divulge to your man why you like these characters, and why they are significant source of comfort as well as entertainment.
The honesty and genuine feelings you had as a kid reading comic books will make your partner feel closer to you by letting him in on your “origin story.”
But if none of this convinces him to love the same things you love, that’s ok too. It’s common for couples to have different types of interests. In fact, this can make the whole experience of being in a relationship more varied and interesting, so long as both people are open-minded to unfamiliar experiences.
Besides, the more you get to know each other the more likely you will both be able to appreciate something in every activity, because you’re still having fun with your partner, despite your different interests.
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
My partner and I have been dating for three years, and she recently brought up the idea of living together in the future. This is freaking me out a little bit. I’m sure there are some advantages to living together, but I’m not sure I’m ready for that kind of commitment. How is this going to change our relationship?
—Couple Conundrum
Dear CC,
Make no mistake, moving in together is a big step in any relationship. I have a feeling you already know you need to talk to your girlfriend, so I won’t bother explaining that step.
As relationships mature over time, this social norm is kind of inevitable. Typically if your relationship is progressing emotionally and you still love spending time with her, then moving in is an expected next step.
However, with any new venture there’s always a learning curve. The biggest change with living with someone is that you need to practice your communication with each other, because there will be shared living arrangements and you don’t want to be crowding each other’s personal space too much.
There are definitely some great advantages and some mutual adjustments to consider when moving in with your partner.
This includes saving money on rent, merging all your things together, and establishing a personal space with your partner.
Another big benefit is the sense of commitment you’ll gain in your relationship, increased communication with you partner. And—lucky you—a much easier access to a spontaneous sex life.
So, since the idea has been brought your way, it’s a great time to think about this yourself and where you stand in the relationship. You may even talk yourself into it!
Love,
Di
