Dear Di,
My boyfriend is coming to visit from out of town on the weekend before Valentine’s Day. Because we go to different schools, we haven’t had sex in a while, and I’m worried I won’t be able to meet his expectations. Any advice?
—Kinky Wannabe
Dear KW,
Although some may not want to make a big deal out of it, Valentine’s Day is always a great time to spice up your sex life. This is especially true when dealing with the constant sexual frustration that comes from having a gap in your “routine.”
Lucky for you, there are plenty of stress-free ways to make your sexual reunion exciting and special for Valentine’s Day.
The best way to make sure that sex is satisfying is to not expect it. That is, try not to plan it to a tee, and let things, shall I say, come naturally. Planning sex can take away from the excitement and put some unnecessary pressure on both of you.
You might also consider experimenting with something new. There’s nothing more exciting than doing something you’ve never done before in bed. Try adding a sex toy to your collection, or some new positions to your bedroom repertoire. Of course, stay within your comfort zone, but giving new techniques a chance will most likely liven things up between the sheets.
Booking a hotel could also be a great way to amp up your celebrations. Getting yourself away from your everyday environment will play into the kinkiness of things, and help you get away from your roommate or family, who might otherwise interrupt your long-awaited sexy time.
However you decide to celebrate, make sure you pop some champagne, put on your favourite outfit, and make the most out of the weekend!
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
My friend recently broke up with her girlfriend and has been feeling pretty low lately. Valentine’s Day is coming up and I don’t want her to sulk in bed all day. Any ideas on what I could do to cheer her up?
—Heartbroken Valentine
Dear HV,
The Valentine’s Day blues are certainly inevitable for some, and your friend shouldn’t feel like she’s the only one wallowing in her break-up this time of year. The most important thing to do in this situation is to remind her that, despite the lack of romance in her life, she is still loved and appreciated by those around her.
Try reminding your friend that Valentine’s Day is a celebration of love, and should not be limited to romantic relationships. Friendships often go under the radar on Feb. 14, so make sure you spend the day giving her some much-needed womance to uplift her spirits.
Never underestimate the power of a chick flick to cheer a gal up. You might want to avoid sappy movies, as this might not pair nicely with her ongoing heartache. I suggest something snappy like Bridesmaids or Mean Girls, mostly because they focus more on the comedy aspect than they do on the lovey-dovey stuff.
Romantic Italian restaurants aren’t only meant for couples to enjoy. Try trekking it to Little Italy and indulge in some rich carbonara and tiramisu with a nice bottle of wine. This will not only get your friend out of the house, but it’ll also allow both of you to treat yourself to some fine dining—a rare luxury for university students.
Weather permitting, you might want to go skating on the canal or walk around in the Byward Market, since physical activity is known to boost your endorphins. There’s nothing better than a runner’s high to fight off one’s sorrows, even if you’re only running to the Beavertail stand.
The most important thing when it comes to helping your friend on Valentine’s Day is to make sure that she knows that love comes in all sorts of forms, and that you’re always there for her.
Love,
Di
