Dear Di,
I’m relatively new to sex. I thought I would try stepping outside of my comfort zone when I came to university by trying the whole “one night stand” thing. I met a guy at Fedstock and went for it. Everything was great until he pulled out and his condom didn’t come with him. It really freaked me out! The condom got lodged somewhere in my vagina. I eventually extracted it, but I still have to ask: is this something normal? What if it happens again? I can’t be the only person to have lost a condom in my vagina?
-Condom Castaway
Dear CCA,
Don’t worry. This same thing has definitely happened to a number of people!
Condom slippage is an unfortunate reality of sex. However, you need not worry about the condom being lost permanently. In most cases, the cervical opening is not large enough for a condom to go through. All you need to do is insert your fingers into your vagina and retrieve what you have lost. If you’re comfortable enough you can ask your partner to try to fish it out, which can be sexy and pleasurable, depending on the situation.
If you’re still having a difficult time you can shift your position. Try standing up or putting one leg on a chair. If the condom is being stubborn and you aren’t having luck pulling it out by this point you’ll need to get help from a health professional.
A lost condom can cause a serious infection or irritation if left inside you for too long. So while it’s no cause for immediate alarm, just remember that a condom mishap can leave you at risk of pregnancy or sexually transmitted infection—especially if you’re unaware of your partner’s sexual history.
Making sure your partner puts on his condom properly can help you avoid some of these sticky situations in the first place. The proper technique is as follows: using one hand, pinch the top of the condom (this is done to leave room for the ejaculation), and with the other hand roll the condom to the base of the penis. You can even add lube to the exterior of the condom to lessen friction and the chance of breakage or slippage.
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
I’ve survived frosh week but not without some hiccups along the way. A couple nights ago I met this cute guy who conveniently lives on the same residence floor as me. One thing led to another and now it’s super uncomfortable between us. It may not have been so bad if I didn’t have to constantly run into him all the time. Is there anything I can do to remedy the situation or do I just have to hide in my dorm room until he forgets my face?
-Bumbling Encounters
Dear BE,
Unfortunately this happens a lot during the first few weeks of university life, but there are plenty of things you can do to salvage what dignity you have left.
First of all, you can speak with this guy directly and at least confront the fact that you’ll be seeing each other for the rest of the school year. Who knows, you may actually end up being good friends and laugh about that one hook-up you guys had years ago.
If you’re not an extrovert then you can always just ride it out. You’ll both get over it eventually. Time flies in university, and before you know it you’ll be deep into studying for midterms.
Some students like to get creative and establish a hookup free zone on their floor, so that the closer your potential one night lover lives to you, the less inclined you’ll be to hook up with them again.
Pro tip: it’s usually never a good idea to share a bed with your roommate or your next door neighbour, since—if anything goes wrong—you’ll have to literally live with that mistake for the next eight months.
Love,
Di
Sex position of the week: The Linguini
Lay on your side with a pillow placed under your head and have your man come up from behind you. He needs to use his knees to push open your legs (think of scissors) and then lean over you ever so slightly. Make sure he’s comfortable. He can place his hands near your sides to keep his balance as he enters you. This position will give you deep pleasurable penetration, close to what doggy style offers. Just remember to keep your body limp and enjoy the ride.
