Dear Di,
I work with the hottest person ever. I can’t stop thinking about my co-worker, to the point where he’s even entering my dreams. Is it a bad idea to date someone I work with?
—Workplace Romance
Dear WR,
It’s understandable to want to date someone you’re attracted to, however, you should make sure you’re not just interested because they are the best looking person within close proximity.
The upside to a workplace romance is that it can be exciting and really convenient, especially since you get to see this special someone fairly often.
The downside, besides some companies upholding policies that forbid dating between co-workers, is that the relationship drama you experience could be off the charts.
For example, what if one or both of you is into public displays of affection, which is a no-no in any legitimate workplace? After all, nobody wants to feel like a creepy third wheel in an office space.
If you and your workplace lover get into an argument, which is inevitable, everyone will hear about it, which can be similarly disruptive for your co-workers’ productivity.
And if you’re hooking up with someone casually and you get preferential treatment while this is going on, your co-workers might become resentful of you and your contributions to the company.
Plus, there’s also the worst-case scenario to consider: what if you guys break up? This can muddy the waters in terms of your standing with the company, especially if you’ve been seeing your boss or a higher-up.
Businesses tend to frown upon any kind of sexual conduct in the workplace, and any miscommunication between the two parties could lead to an accusation of sexual harassment down the road.
Even if you’re not searching for a soulmate and you’re just looking for a fun, satisfying hook-up, you should be fully aware that you’re still walking into a tricky situation.
Whether you date a co-worker or not, it’s important to have a frank discussion with your partner or casual hook-up about personal boundaries in the workplace, so every work day is not a looming uncomfortable one for you or your co-workers.
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
The only tolerable part of going home to see my family for Thanksgiving this year is the fact that my partner lives a short drive away. So how do we have sex at either of our homes with the parental units being in such close proximity?
—Holiday Sex
Dear HS,
Your first step when you get back home is to act like a grown-up, so your parents will treat you accordingly. This means be helpful around the house, participate in family stuff, and respectfully put the cellphone away when family members are talking to you.
Step two: You should already feel comfortable inviting your partner over to your parents’ home in order to consider getting wild in their domicile. Otherwise, you may want to re-think how serious you are about this person, since the risk of getting caught and/or introducing them to your family can be complicated.
Step three: Remember you are back home, so sexting should be nixed entirely. All it takes is a snoopy sibling or a nosy aunt to make things very awkward around the dinner table.
Step four: Strategize your sexy time to a space that is located far away from your parents’ room. Sound travels fast, so headboard banging, springs squeaking, or other loud sex noises may be a dead give-away. Try to pick a time when your parents are watching a movie, or alternatively, if they are running errands.
Step five: Always use protection. Put the condom in a tissue, in the trash and, most importantly, don’t let your partner quickly run to the bathroom while they’re half-naked.
Love,
Di
