Dear Ty

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Dear Di,

I have a fantasy about whipped cream. I want to cover my partner in it and lick it off, but I also want it all over—and in—my partner. I know it isn’t the safest, but I think eating out my partner with a little sweet taste (and maybe a cherry on top) would be the hottest thing ever. How can I fulfill this erotic urge?

Sealed with Sweetness

Dear SWS, 

Whipped cream in your partner’s privates might sound incredibly sexy—and tasty—but it probably isn’t the best idea for keeping it clean down there. I mean, the cherry on top is a nice touch, but your partner might get another kind of surprise—like a yeast infection from the sugary whipped cream. 

If you’re set on la crème de la crème, I recommend experimenting with whipped cream on the body everywhere except your genitalia. This will keep your privates perky and pleasant. A little post-whip tip that you might want to consider is that dairy products tend not to leave the most appealing odour once they dry on your skin. But I’ll leave that decision in your capable hands (and mouth).

Your other options are pretty exciting if you’re willing to sub in something else in place of the whip. Edible body paint will let you have more safe sexual play with an equally tasty flavour. There’s a wide variety of fun flavours for you to try out that are also much safer to apply down south.

I hope that answers your question, SWS! Get sampling and you’ll seal in the sweetness just fine.



Dear Di,

My girlfriend and I are long-distance, so whenever we get the chance to see each other over the holidays is like a dream come true, and our sex is mutually pleasing. However, while we’re apart, the sex is basically non-existent, mostly because I suck at phone sex. I just can’t get off the same, or give my girl any verbal stimulation without her beside me. Lately it’s been putting a real downer on our relationship. Any tips to improve my phone sexing?

—Fire Over the Wire

Dear FOTW, 

I’m glad you two are seeking to spice it up through a phone call. It’s all too often that our desires are communicated more through a text—or a dick pic—than face to face, and much can get lost in the translation. Your question is a good one, though, because long-distance is never easy. There truly is no replacement for your partner in the flesh, and when you’re alone without a cuddle buddy beside you, it can seem awfully hard to get your juices and words flowing.

You seem to know how to please your girl when she’s with you, so maybe thinking about how you get her off will help heat up your vocal cords. Confidence is key, but be yourself—you want to come across as certain in your sexual convictions, but say things that you would actually say when the two of you are together. It might also help to exchange an article of clothing next time you’re together: scents are very powerful at stimulating emotions and desires.

Phone sex works both ways, so it’s up to both you and your partner to communicate what you want to hear to give you those feel-good feels. Phone sex can also give you that little extra push: You can ask her what she’d like you to do to her, but sometimes it’s more thrilling when you take the reins and tell your partner what your body is craving. Do you two have a special sexy move that you do every time you’re together? Talk about it! You can slowly turn off lights in your room to get more comfortable, undress, and start to stoke your own fires. As you get going, feel free to moan and make the sounds you usually would with your partner. You could also consider phone sex as an orgasmic opportunity to explore fantasies together—even those you haven’t tried in person yet!

Phone sex should take you to a place where touching yourself is almost as good as the real thing. With a little practice and imagination, you’ll create the perfect storm.