Dear Di,
I have a wicked curve in my penis. It’s with me through erection and flaccidity, and I have had it as long as I can remember. It can make it tricky sometimes to enter my partner smoothly and pleasurably. How can I best get around this boner barrier and give my partner the same enjoyment I’m getting?
—Captain Hook
Dear CH,
Embrace your curves! This is just the nature of how two bodies fit together, Hook! Your best chance of optimizing a seamless entry and ride is to communicate with your partner to see what causes pain versus pleasure. Lube will yet again prove to be a man’s and woman’s best friend in this case.
Your partner’s vagina or anus may be situated in a way that makes some positions more pressured and painful. I recommend positions that are shallow, and positions in which your partner is able to control the penetration, thrust, and rhythm (Think doggy-style or reverse cowgirl). This will help them avoid any unwanted pokes.
If you’re really feeling the heat from your partner, you can always give the doc a try. Penile curves are actually pretty common, and there are lots of options your doctor may be able to recommend to help you master that curveball.
Love,
Di
Dear Di,
I have this awful worry that my vagina tastes and smells bad. I have never had anyone complain before while performing a little oral magic on me, but I tend to eat a lot of veggies and citrus fruits. Could this affect the taste and smell of my fluids?
—Unsavory for the Senses
Dear US,
My first question to you is why you seem to think your body isn’t a feast for all your partner’s senses. Without a doubt, there have been a lot of comments about the “fishy” nature of a woman’s vagina, but in my personal opinion, it’s a lot of fish shit. Women everywhere are raised with negative messages and perspectives on how we should appear, taste, smell, and whatever other sense you want to satisfy. It causes a lot of unnecessary anxiety about whether or not our genitals are going to be acceptable to other people.
My words of wisdom? People who enjoy a healthy sexual relationship—over the span of a night or over many years—love the taste and smell of their female partners. It’s one of those intimate moments, because the smell and taste are those of arousal. Desire. Sex. And all those things are usually a turn-on, not a turn-off.
The really important thing is making sure you’re comfortable in the sack. Every woman has a different vaginal flavour, and your eau de vag may vary depending on things like your diet, but also from natural secretions, your level of arousal, and even sweat. Tasty, eh?
Concerning your diet, there isn’t much scientific evidence. Here’s the scoop: taste is largely subjective, so while maybe some foods may make you taste better—or worse—the taste itself is really up to the vaginal connoisseur themselves.
Love,
Di
