The Tomato

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Schwarzenegger, Van Damme quit acting to focus on other artistic endeavours

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Illustration by Tina Wallace

A number of Hollywood action stars have followed in the footsteps of Sylvester Stallone and are now pursuing other artistic forms than acting.

Stallone, star of Rocky and First Blood, unveiled his art exhibit in Russia on Oct. 27. The exhibit, entitled “Sylvester Stallone. Art. 1975–2013,” is made up of mostly self-portraits showing Stallone’s interpretation of scenes from his popular movies.

In an interview with the Associated Press, Stallone explained why he enjoys painting far more than acting.

“I think I’m a much better painter than actor,” said Stallone. “It’s much more personal and I’m allowed to just do what I want to do. Quite often in acting you have to play a certain part, you cannot speak as much as you want to speak.”

Stallone’s courageous leap into visual art has encouraged other action stars to throw in the towel on acting and embark on a new artistic path.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, the actor and former governor of California, has decided to give up acting to take part in what he calls his true calling: interpretive dance.

“I’ve always longed to translate particular feelings, emotions, and fantasies into movements of dramatic expression,” Schwarzenegger said in an exclusive interview with the Tomato.

“I was drawn to interpretive dance by the lavish costumes, ribbons, and spandex bodysuits,” he said. “I also feel a sense of ecstasy when I perform with wide swooshes of the arms, spins, and drops to the floor.”

Schwarzenegger is currently performing for change and scraps of food at various subway stops in Los Angeles.

Jean-Claude Van Damme, an action hero who starred alongside Stallone and Schwarzenegger in last year’s Expendables 2, has come clean about his love for playing the clarinet.

“I watch a lot of Sponge Bob, and seeing Squidward play the clarinet really sparked my interest in the instrument,” said Van Damme. “I go to every one of my six-year-old niece’s clarinet recitals and her instructor was nice enough to let me participate in one of them.”

Van Damme has been taking clarinet lessons for the last few months, mastering “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.” He said he’s “excited” about performing in a Christmas recital in early December.

Schwarzenegger and Van Damme may be the first ones to come forward since Stallone’s exhibit, but there are sure to be many more action stars who quit acting to pursue other artistic ventures in the coming months. Rumours have surfaced that Chuck Norris loves synchronized swimming and has been practising with the American Olympic team in hopes of cracking the 2016 squad.