The Tomato

Prime Minister Justin Trudeau found himself in trouble over use of Klingon. Photo: CC, President of the Republic of Mexico, Cristiano Betta, StateFarm. Edits: Jaclyn McRae-Sadik.
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News of the controversy, confusion rapidly spreads across the galaxy

On Monday, constituents aboard the HMCS Voyageur were left in shock after Prime Minister Justin Trudeau answered all of their questions in Klingon.

Many Anglophones were left asking their bilingual companions “qaStaH nuq?” as the PM droned on about pot legalization and his latest scuffle with Starfleet High Command.

The linguistic makeup of this ship is primarily Klingon, but at least six per cent of the crew speak English, which acts as the common operating language in Starfleet.

Voyageur engineer Rudy Joss was particularly taken aback by Trudeau’s choice of language, since she knows that all officers on board must know Federation Standard English.

“I had pressing questions about the ship’s transporter operating manual,” Joss said in a statement to the Starfleet Broadcasting Corporation (SBC). “The instruction manual is entirely in Klingon, which actually goes against Starfleet regulations.”

“By ignoring my question, I really feel disrespected.”

Ceraldo Gutting heads the Starshippers’ Association, which represents the Anglophone minority aboard the Voyageur, and believes that Trudeau’s transgression was akin to a physical assault. 

“It was if someone had just walked up to me and hit me in the cranial antennae,” the Andorian told the SBC. “Trudeau spoke to the Vulcans in their mother tongue last week, so why should we get different treatment. I just … it’s incredible.”

Even the Klingon Community Groups Network roundly criticized the PM, saying, in an official statement, that not even staunch defenders of the Klingon language would make such a blunder.

While Trudeau added he was “surprised” at the number of English-language questions aboard the ship, three separate complaints have been filed with the Office of the Starship Fleet Commissioner on Official Languages.

The PM began the backpedaling process shortly after that, stating that perhaps answering in a “mixture of Klingon and English would have been best.”

Unfortunately, for many outlets, this official statement was only published in Klingon, causing even more mass confusion.

Many claimed the PM went so far as to say that “Hab SoSli’ Quch,” though the Daily Earth swear they heard “Heghlu’meH QaQ jajvam,” a statement which could have triggered a galactic civil war after the recent election upset on Venus.

This recent blunder, coming just weeks after a vacation in the holodeck of wealthy businessman Aja Kling, has given a lot of ammunition to the Intergalactic Conservative Party as they gear up for their leadership race.

With the current political climate, one can only ask “QaStaH nuq?”

QaStaH nuq, indeed.

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