Special features fireworks show, board members dressed as elves  

On Sunday, Dec. 3, MTV aired the holiday special of their hit reality show Keeping Up with the Boardashians, following the antics of the Student Federation of the University of Ottawa (SFUO).

Kathryn LeSwank, vice-president services and communications for the SFUO hosted the special, dressed as Mrs. Claus.

“Happy holidays, folks, and welcome to a Very Merry Boardashians! I’ll be your host for this week’s episode, as we look back on some of our favourite memories from this past year, and share our favourite holiday memories with you,” said LeSwank. “To kick things off, let’s check in on our vice-president finance, Richie Lachic, and see how he’s spending the holidays!”

The cameras panned to show Lachic in a hot tub at Nordik Spa-Nature sipping on a glass of eggnog.

“Oh, I didn’t see you there,” said Lachic, lowering his sunglasses to look into the cameras. “You know, during the holidays, I love to take some much needed me-time. A weekend getaway to Nordik Spa always does the trick.”

“I know exactly what you mean, Richie” said LeSwank. “Now, let’s check in on our executive coordinator, Vanessa Dorislayin’, and see what she’s up to this holiday season.”

The scene cut to a cozy office with a crackling fire in the fireplace, and six stockings hung along the mantle—one for each member of the executive.

“As executive coordinator, part of my job involves keeping the execs in check,” said Dorislayin’. “Right now I’m making a list of which execs have been naughty, and which have been nice.”

Dorislayin’ scanned a sheet of paper in front of her, pausing. “Well, it looks like everyone has been nice this year, except… Kathryn! Well, I know what she’s getting in her stocking.” As she opened a desk drawer and picked out a lump of coal, the episode cut to commercial.

A few minutes later the episode returned, with LeSwank now standing in the concrete space by the Faculty of Social Sciences building. “Sorry about that, folks, some minor… technical difficulties. Bad comms, bad comms… anyhow, let’s check in on our president, Wadi Hess! Wadi, what are you doing during this festive time of year?”

Hess cleared his throat. “My dedicated team of board members is helping set up the big holiday party tonight! We’ll have lights, music, food, and a special surprise to end off the night!”

The cameras turned to show an assembly line of faculty directors dressed as elves preparing decorations and other necessities for the festivities.

Following another commercial break, the cameras now showed executive members, faculty directors, and students mingling in the concrete space, surrounding a brightly lit tree.

“That’s the most green I’ve ever seen in this green space,” said David Ericson, editor-in-chief of the Tomato, who was covering the event.

“Folks, folks, may I have your attention!” said Wess, walking up to the stage. “I have a big surprise for all of you. This is something many of you have been waiting years for: a fireworks show!”

The students applauded as the fireworks began, but thirty seconds into the show, one of the fireworks hit the sidewall of FSS. The screen cut to black, with the sounds of sirens shortly afterwards.

In a tweet to MTV, LeSwank wrote that the Boardashians has been canceled until further notice.