A recent study led by University of Ottawa researcher Dr. Jarius Cross led to a shocking discovery. There was, collectively, zero reading done by U of O students during the winter semester reading week.
The Tomato
To commemorate the end of an era, MTV brought on former SFUO presidential candidate Oprah to host a lookback special of some of the SFUO’s most cherished moments.
According to his roommates, Michael DiMarco had gone to Minto Sports Complex for an early morning workout and hadn’t returned.
An independent investigation spurred by recent releases of Fyre Festival documentaries, has revealed that student unions were behind the whole thing. Samantha Odd and Angel Shawarma, the lead investigators, held a press conference earlier this week.
The challenge, which ran from Feb. 4 to 10, resulted in a higher lack of productivity than usual, with only three of 23 councillor seats occupied throughout the week. (Councillors who were not part of the challenge still used it as an excuse for their absences).
There was no mistaking it for Betty DeGrudge when, on a blustery, snow-covered Thursday morning, she finished her long drive in from the outskirts of the city, crossing over the Laurier Avenue bridge and into University of Ottawa territory: students are such a pain-in-the-ass.
After binge-watching all eight episodes of Tidying Up With Marie Kondo, a third-year U of O student went on a cleaning-spree. But it seems that she’s taken Kondo’s advice a little too seriously.
Jane Drummond, the student in question, has been on a “rampage” according to her concerned roommates Kristopher Trent and Jennifer Fremont.
In all my four years at this university not once has anyone mentioned the fact that we have a library! I’ve spent nights hunched over in dorm rooms, finishing essays by lamplight, paying for research from journals that I could have accessed for free?? I am livid.
Last week, for example, the club took a trip to the renowned Chez Ninety9, where, among
other delicacies, the group split a six-pack of deep-fried chicken morsels that club president Geoff Stache described as “almost tapa-like.”
History has been made by Dean Wels, a third-year student at the Telfer School of Management, who has somehow been placed on academic probation in the first week of school after winter break.
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