Companies come up with ways to get hit of legalized weed revenues In light of federal court judge Michael Phelan’s recent ruling, which struck down a previous ban on medical marijuana patients growing their own plants, a new bill is being lobbied for in Parliament that would permit businesses to grow their own plants and …
Shortly after the news that campus station would close for the last three days of exams came a not-so-shocking announcement from university administration. In a press conference about the closure the university admitted they have been actively trying to make students’ lives miserable and more difficult for the past few years as part of a …
Ottawa hot spot to serve limited-time-only menu of ice cream, chips and break up songs It’s almost Valentine’s Day and couples new and old are rushing to make reservations at their favourite restaurants for a romantic night on the town. But not all restaurants will be at their disposal on this romantic evening. Recently, downtown …
Rapper’s arrival sparks creation of many new campus clubs Rapper and flat earth theory advocate B.o.B is in Ottawa this week to use LeBreton Flats as a testing ground to prove to the world his belief that the planet is flat. City officials invited B.o.B to come to Ottawa because “It’d great for the city …
Paulina picks more diverse nominee list than actual academy The Academy Awards are just around the corner and, in response to the criticism the Academy’s received for its lack of diverse choices for its acting nominations, it has decided to enlist the help of a mollusk medium. Paulina the Octopus has been brought onto the …
Neighbourhood to become local alternative to Rideau Canal In an unprecedented move, the Ottawa City Council has decided to convert Sandy Hill into a giant outdoor skating rink, after mounting frustrations about the Rideau Canal opening late. The City has taken the controversial decision to convert one of Ottawa’s most well-known neighbourhoods into a full-fledged …
Council holds emergency meeting to debate costly project The City of Ottawa has called an emergency council meeting to talk about City plans to purchase a giant freezer to insta-freeze the Rideau Canal. The emergency meeting to vote on this issue is expected to be held on Jan. 18 at city hall. This ambitious project …
U of O expansion plans roll forward with aquatic playground The recent closure of the Fauteux and 1 Nicholas buildings on campus seemed innocuous at first, but in fact heralded the university’s most ambitious expansion plan to date. The university has decided to create a waterpark in the space to attract more international students. The …
City of Ottawa designs municipal Beavertail flavour After a Halifax’s taxpayer-funded report on whether donair should be the city’s official food came up short, returning a maybe, Ottawa has decided to launch an investigation to claim an official food for the city. Some of the most popular recommendations were a shawarma, a cookie from the …
Supreme Court rules on legal defence, allows cruel practical jokes to prevail In an unexpected move , the Supreme Court of Canada has ruled that “it’s just a prank,” is a iron-clad legal defence. The ruling came in the wake of many YouTube videos that got their creators into trouble for executing pranks—which, unfortunately, weren’t …
U of O student realizes it’s December Philip Roberts, first-year student and Marchand resident, has been in a trance-like state ever since his roommate revealed to him that it’s actually December. It’s an easy thing to miss, between having a so-called “midterm” a week before final exams start, and the unseasonably warm weather. Normally the …
UN to provide peacekeeping forces to resolve baboon dispute After news that the Toronto zoo is closing its baboon enclosure due to fights between female members, the United Nations (UN) has stepped in with hopes of peacefully resolving the power struggle. In light of recent UN failure to mediate in Syria they’ve moved onto more …
Committee advises one per centers to buy planet The City of Dubai’s spending habits know no boundaries. Following the ordering of jetpacks for firefighters and first responders earlier this month, the city has created a committee to find new and ridiculous ways to spend their riches. The most daring proposal presented by a some of …
Oxford English Dictionary unveils plans for wordless dictionary In an attempt to stay culturally relevant, the Oxford English Dictionary has announced that its 2016 edition will be written entirely in emoji. This decision comes soon after Oxford University Press (OUP)—the publisher of the dictionary—named an emoji as the “Word of the Year” for 2015. The …
Netflix and Facebook follow Amazon’s lead and build stores Many online giants are following Amazon’s lead and opening storefronts after the company opened a brick-and-mortar bookstore in Seattle on Nov. 2. The most notable company to follow Amazon’s lead is Netflix. Earlier this week, Netflix’s CEO, Reed Hastings, announced in a press conference, that the …
All questions to Prime Minister now returned with generic answer In a prime example of finding a good sound bite and sticking with it, Justin Trudeau has begun answering every question asked of him with “because it’s 2015.” His response to a reporter’s question about why a gender equal Cabinet was so important became an …
International fast food chain renames major menu items to make them more realistic McDonald’s has shocked the world by recalling millions of buns, patties and cheese slices from locations across Canada. The move has been described as a “precautionary legal strategy”, as McDonald’s looks to stave off any false advertising lawsuits from the Canadian public. …
In a surprising turn of events, Canada has discovered that it has a baseball team. In an even more surprising turn of events, the team is apparently doing quite well.
The results of Monday’s federal election voting is in, and for the first time in Canadian history, the Rhinoceros party has won a majority government. This result comes as even more of surprise since it wasn’t predicted in any of the major polls, blindsiding many seasoned political analysts.
Rez students left without microwave following holiday mishap Photo: CC, Bill Mubray, Edited by Kim Wiens Several University of Ottawa students are counting their lucky stars after their Thanksgiving dinner plans went awry. The students were trying to capture the festive holiday spirit on campus, since many weren’t able to go home this year. Witnesses …
Student foils deception—Tim Horton’s, U of O face conspiracy allegations Photo: CC, SteFou A U of O student has discovered the existence of a magical beverage that is now coming soon to the University of Ottawa campus. According to sources the beverage is known as an “iced cappuccino”, and is a cold, sweet, creamy drink that …
Staff lets him stay, despite sanitary concerns Photo: Kim Wiens Liam Cook, a first-year communications student, has moved into the new dining hall the second week of classes after seeing all the new amenities the all-you-can-eat, 24/7 cafeteria offers. Cook gave the Tomato an exclusive tour of his new home, after he’d been living there for …
Stunt videos needed to keep ownership of user content Photo: CC-Ed Gregory, Edits by Kim Wiens This week Facebook announced its decision to collect user photos, videos and information beginning early next year to steal users data for their own use. This move has lead to a high volume of legal declarations on Facebook feeds, …
Capital Skies hopes to provide relief for commuters stuck in traffic Photo: CC-Perry Hiemer Are you tired of waiting in massive traffic jams caused by Ottawa’s never ending construction? A new company called Capital Skies is trying to make those waits a thing of the past. For a modest fee of $90, the company will pick …
Ottawa divided on new employment issue Illustration: Marta Kierkus A recently surfaced video showing a rat dragging a piece of pizza down a set of stairs on a New York City subway platform has ignited a new debate in the animal rights movement. Activists are demanding for the right to work to apply to rats too, …
